Chapter 44:  Bungle in the Jungle

The rivers are full of crocodile nasties,

And he who made kittens put snakes in the grass.

He's a lover of life, but a player of pawns.

Yes, the king on his sunset lies waiting for dawn

To light up his jungle as play is resumed.

The monkeys seem willing to strike up the tune.

Jethro Tull

November 2nd - 6th, Albanus 1.

Despite the world-threatening dangers that loomed all about them, the band now turned their attention to a much smaller task.  Some time ago their aunt Surilla lured twenty of Corvina's Altanian friends into a drow slavers' ambush.  The Surrexi negotiated their release with Ambassador Anat;  in exchange for information on the illythid in Rostilla, Anat would recover those Altanians and arrange to have them released.  Anat performed her half of the deal;  now the party had to go to the Falls of Catar to pick the Altanians up and help them get back to their tribe in Madreponas.

On the morning of November 2nd, Marius cast wind walk on his family and the band headed south.  They crossed the Bay of Viridistan and sailed down the coast of the Barony of Ferreus -- the barony which belonged to the Praetor, and where (it was said) he kept his mad wife locked up.  Two more luxurious baronies flew by (Matutinus and Monstratus).  Then they reached the northern plains of Altania, which were dotted with "mercatori" towns (Altanian villages that paid the southern Viridian baronies for protection).  South of that, they came to the infamous jungles of Altania.  For hours they sped down the coast, past mile after mile of flat, featureless rainforest.  Eventually they came to an enormous river, perhaps a mile across, which spewed a tan plume of mud and silt into the ocean.  This was the great Madreponas River (whose name meant "Mother's Suffering or Pain" in Old Viridian), which gave the city of Madreponas its name.

Turning west, the band zoomed up this river for a couple hundred miles, streaming past tiny wood-pallisaded villages.  In time they saw huge snow-capped mountains rising before them:  the gigantic range that divided the realms of Altania and the Dus-Lands.  As they rose towards them, the Madreponas narrowed and grew turbulent, cascading down great rapids and falls.  Late in the afternoon they arrived at the Falls of Catar, where the young Madreponas dropped 800 feet off the mountain sides, filling the air with mist and never-ending thunder.  An ancient stone road zig-zagged its way up the mountain's shoulder;  at the top of the falls, the road crossed the river on a rickety rope bridge that swayed in the wind.

This was where the drow had arranged to meet and deliver the slaves.  Having no faith in the drow honor, the party scouted the area thoroughly.  Severus found odd markings on several trees:  reports on the movement of caravans and Altanians left, he believed, by drow scouts.  The count pulled out a knife and carefully altered some of the messages, hoping to send the next slaving party on a wild goose chase.  Gaius, meanwhile, located two caverns which appeared to have passages leading deep into the earth.  One contained four orcs -- who were so bored they were close to killing each other just to relieve the tedium.  The caverns beyond them had some sort of magical spell warding them.  So instead of investigating them, the party chose to announce their presence to the orcish guards.

Corvina spoke a bit of Dark Speech and so she demanded that the orcs summon their mistress at once.  After some snarling and spear waving, the orc obeyed.  His mistress was a drow named Maraset;  to the paladins, her aura was a lightless cloak of velvet dark.  Not nefas -- but about as plain old-fashioned evil as you could get.  Maraset groused that they were late, then produced all twenty of the Altanians from the caverns below.  Many bore slight wounds:  brands, half-healed lash marks, scabbed wrists which suggested they'd been forced to wear heavy manacles.  But none of these injuries were new;  the Altanians had, apparently, not been harmed since Anat expressed an interest in them.

Though she tried to hide it, Maraset was quite intriuged by this exchange.  The ambassador, she informed Corvina, had requested these particular slaves -- as if one minion was any different from another.  Why?  What was the ambassador playing at?  Severus -- through Corvina -- offer to sell her the same information that the ambassador had purchased with these slaves.  For "only" 20,000 gp.  The drow pondered this offer, then sent an orc below.  "Tell Tanit to give you her armor," she said.  The orc did (getting a whip across the face for his efforts), and Maraset traded it for the information on the illythid in Rostilla.  Seeming quite pleased with the bargain.

They parted on good terms... or so they thought.  Despite the rain, which poured down in curtains, the band headed down the mountain road.  The stairs were almost rapids, so much water rushed down them.  Gaius took point, searching for spots where the steps were worn away.  Using magical light and Titus' flaming sword, they inched their way downhill for hours, long into the night.  Some time past midnight they reached the jungle floor, and caught a few hours of soggy sleep.

The torrential rain continued for three more days as they slowly worked their way through the rain forest, towards the first navigable portion of the river, where they hoped to find a ship to transport the Altanians to Madreponas.  The first excitement occurred on the second day, when they had to ford the rain-bloated Madreponas.  Trees, branches, and dead animals drifted by in the muddy, roiling water.  Titus and Sinister braved the river first, seeking the best route.  When they were in the middle of the river, the paladin's warhorse suddenly snorted.  Four odd "logs" were drifting towards them -- one upstream...  Fifteen-foot long specimens of the dreaded "Altanian water lizard."

Fortunately, using Titus as gator-bait, the party found it easy to dispatch the creatures.  Severus and Corvina rained fireballs down upon them.  Gaius and Leyna filled them full of arrows.  The gators, for their part, kept grabbing Titus by the leg.  But each time one fastened on him, the party brought it down before it could drag him under water.  The last lizard charged out onto the bank after Leyna, and she and Severus finished it off.

The rain continued the next day.  Severus was now at the front of the party, and around noon he spotted ropes running from some trees down into the thick muck that covered the "road" they followed.  Surveillance revealed that there were also two men watching these ropes from a tree -- and another twenty about 100 feet off the road.  The latter were huddled under a cart in a vain attempt to keep dry.

Slavers it seemed.  From the city of Vardane, judging by their speech.  The party quietly surrounded the no-goodniks.  Then everyone except Gaius marched up boldly.  At first, the slavers didn't seem at all worried.  One waved cheerfully at Leyna and wandered out to talk.  However when they were ordered to chain themselves up with their own manacles and crawl into the cart, things got rather surly.  The slavers seemed a bit intimidated by the two paladins -- more so, after Titus broke their leader's nose.  And they had some difficulty believing that the party truly intended to sell them into slavery.  "Don't you got a problem with that?" one asked Titus, seeking to drag things out.  "No," the paladin replied, "but I do have a problem with the delay."  In the end, all the slavers surrendered.  One had to be shot in the knee to make a point -- but everyone understood the point, once it was made.  And so the party continued on, with the Altanian children riding in the cart and the slavers strung out behind it.

On their last day, the rain finally broke.  And people realized that clear days in Altania were far, far worse than rainy ones.  The temperature soared and the air was full of steam and dank mist.  Corvina stripped to minimal clothes;  everyone else either gutted it out or surreptitiously cast "endure heat" upon themselves.  Mid-afternoon they came to the village of Stillwell, where they found a civilized looking boat docked.

It was also a very familiar boat:  the Skipping Stone.  Yes, their old "friend", Captain Rafe Skunk-biter (now Captain Chops) was loading up his ship for the run back down to Madreponas.  Chops greeted them all with great delight -- which waxed even greater when he saw (and recognized) some of the enslaved slavers.  The good captain (well, neutral captain anyways...) agreed to transport them downstream for the bargain price of 1 gp a head.  The cabin boy got a little sulky when he spotted Marius, then consoled himself that at least Balthasar wasn't there.

During the five days in Altania, Severus sent two baiting messages to Pontifex Phinias, without actually mentioning this fact to his family.  The first mocked the priest for not responding to the insult sent when they acquired this half of the rod of messages from the spy in Surrexus:  "No answer? Do I frighten you?   Perhaps your demotion to Albanus cum puppet and Eboricus tool have left you speechless. Do you know how many times Eboricus has failed before? You wouldnt be the first he led to failure."

The second said, "You were sacrificed once, do you really think a hat of disguise will keep you safe?  Surilla wants blood.  I think I shall tell her you suggested the marriage to make Albanus more manageable."